1
00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:15,868
-Push! Yes! There you go!
2
00:01:15,951 --> 00:01:18,328
-Okay, give me one more good push!
3
00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:20,247
You can do it, Holly!
4
00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:23,125
-Tell her she can do it, Ted.
5
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:26,211
Okay, Ted says you can do it, Holly! Yes.
6
00:01:54,990 --> 00:01:56,617
I usually give it a kick.
7
00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:57,993
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
8
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:01,079
-Right there.
9
00:02:01,163 --> 00:02:03,582
I mean, I could do it for you,
if you'd like.
10
00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:06,752
No, I've been doing all my own kicking
since third grade, so...
11
00:02:09,086 --> 00:02:12,799
What, so just one kick
and then apparently magic?
12
00:02:12,883 --> 00:02:13,800
Mm-hmm.
13
00:02:35,531 --> 00:02:37,115
Josh.
14
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,868
This has been the best year of my life.
15
00:02:39,952 --> 00:02:43,121
I never thought I'd meet someone
I connect with on so many levels.
16
00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:47,709
You make me feel like I have
a champion and a confidant.
17
00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:52,130
I can tell you anything without judgment,
and you always have my back.
18
00:02:52,714 --> 00:02:55,592
I love you. So here's to us.
19
00:02:56,635 --> 00:02:57,761
I feel the same way.
20
00:02:59,137 --> 00:02:59,972
What?
21
00:03:00,556 --> 00:03:02,015
"I feel the same way"?
22
00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:04,643
Yeah. Yeah. Can we clink now?
23
00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:06,103
It's our one-year anniversary.
24
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:09,481
I guess I was expecting something
a little more special.
25
00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:13,694
Sorry to interrupt.
Would you like to see the dessert tray?
26
00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:15,779
Sure, why not?
27
00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,035
Happy anniversary.
28
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:48,020
No, it's mine.
29
00:03:57,154 --> 00:04:00,991
So, what is
the Sacred Heart Love Trail all about?
30
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:04,328
Well, six years ago, Joanna and I
31
00:04:04,411 --> 00:04:06,955
took a look around
and we were super bummed.
32
00:04:07,039 --> 00:04:09,708
All these relationships falling apart.
33
00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:12,211
Heartbreak out there on the planet.
34
00:04:12,294 --> 00:04:14,463
So Marv and I created a way
35
00:04:14,546 --> 00:04:18,466
for couples to disconnect from the world
and reconnect with each other.
36
00:04:18,550 --> 00:04:22,513
Before you head out, there's
a couple of items that we've provided.
37
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:23,722
In your love bags.
38
00:04:23,805 --> 00:04:26,433
The most important is a heart
39
00:04:26,517 --> 00:04:30,145
carved out of sacred Chippewa stone
with your name on it.
40
00:04:30,229 --> 00:04:33,106
We ask that you give this
to your partner every day
41
00:04:33,190 --> 00:04:35,609
and think about what that really means...
42
00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:37,945
-...to give your heart to someone.
-I love them.
43
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:41,698
Feel free to explore,
but don't wander too far from the trail.
44
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:44,034
There's no cell service here in the wild,
45
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,537
and we don't want anyone dying out there.
46
00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:47,829
Right.
47
00:04:47,913 --> 00:04:51,708
Seriously, uh, some people died last time.
48
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,169
Most of all,
remember to use this time
49
00:04:54,253 --> 00:04:56,213
as a way to grow your love for each other.
50
00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:58,090
And don't worry about the clouds.
51
00:04:58,173 --> 00:05:00,008
Weatherman says it'll clear soon
52
00:05:00,092 --> 00:05:02,386
and the rest of the week
is nothing but sunshine.
53
00:05:04,179 --> 00:05:05,556
-Mel!
-Leave me alone!
54
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:07,683
All I said was we should bail on the hike.
55
00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:10,561
I didn't mean us in general.
I just meant the hike!
56
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:13,146
I mean, come on,
we've been lost for hours,
57
00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:15,482
our phones don't work,
we're wet and miserable,
58
00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:17,693
you're pissed off at me for some reason.
59
00:05:17,776 --> 00:05:19,570
-Oh. "For some reason"?
-Okay.
60
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:21,238
You lost my heart.
61
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:23,198
I gave you my heart and you lost it.
62
00:05:23,282 --> 00:05:24,950
Mel, it was a rock.
63
00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:26,243
It was a metaphor.
64
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:28,954
I imbued it with meaning
when I gave it to you.
65
00:05:29,037 --> 00:05:30,664
Are you sure I didn't give it back to you?
66
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,833
Check your backpack,
'cause I'm telling you, I di--
67
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:35,252
Then why do I have your heart?
68
00:05:36,545 --> 00:05:39,339
All right, so-- so what--
Do you want me to go look for it?
69
00:05:39,423 --> 00:05:42,092
Okay, I'll do it.
I will search this whole forest
70
00:05:42,176 --> 00:05:45,470
for that one vaguely heart-shaped rock.
Is that what you want?
71
00:05:45,554 --> 00:05:46,722
Yeah.
72
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:49,474
Babe, it's a rock.
73
00:05:49,558 --> 00:05:52,603
What is the point of doing this
if you're not gonna put in any effort?
74
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,980
I don't know
what the point of this is at all.
75
00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:56,982
You don't wanna make
our relationship better?
76
00:05:57,065 --> 00:05:59,443
Our relationship is fine.
77
00:05:59,526 --> 00:06:02,321
It's... fine.
78
00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:04,156
Why does everything have to be perfect?
79
00:06:04,239 --> 00:06:05,824
Why can't it just be enough?
80
00:06:05,908 --> 00:06:08,118
Okay. Yeah.
Keep pretending nothing's wrong, right?
81
00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:09,828
'Cause it's easier that way.
82
00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:11,121
This is exhausting.
83
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,250
Wait. What's that?
84
00:06:15,334 --> 00:06:17,294
-Church bells?
-You hear them too?
85
00:06:18,128 --> 00:06:20,756
You sometimes hear church bells
no one else does?
86
00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:29,473
There must be a town
across that bridge.
87
00:06:30,849 --> 00:06:31,934
You see a bridge too?
88
00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:33,977
Oh, we're still doing that?
89
00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:57,459
Whoa.
90
00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:01,797
That was weird.
91
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:04,299
It stopped raining.
92
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:06,718
"Schmigadoon"?
93
00:07:07,803 --> 00:07:10,347
As long as they have
a functioning toilet, I'm in.
94
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,558
And what's with all the fake plants?
95
00:07:12,641 --> 00:07:14,601
Maybe they're conserving water.
96
00:07:20,566 --> 00:07:22,317
Okay...
97
00:07:22,401 --> 00:07:23,569
What is this?
98
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:30,242
And why is music coming from everywhere?
99
00:07:30,325 --> 00:07:33,036
♪ Welcome to our little town ♪
100
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,330
♪ Where friends are all you'll meet ♪
101
00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:38,792
♪ And you will never see a frown ♪
102
00:07:38,876 --> 00:07:40,210
Hey, everyone.
103
00:07:40,294 --> 00:07:42,296
Hey there, Pete.
104
00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:48,844
♪ We bet you're prob'ly
Wonderin' what we call ♪
105
00:07:48,927 --> 00:07:55,934
♪ The most beautiful, wonderful
Magical place of all ♪
106
00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:59,271
What-- What is happening?
107
00:07:59,354 --> 00:08:02,816
It must be something they do for tourists.
Like Colonial Williamsburg.
108
00:08:06,445 --> 00:08:09,698
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
109
00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:12,993
♪ Where the sun shines bright
From July to June ♪
110
00:08:13,076 --> 00:08:16,413
♪ And the air's as sweet as a macaroon ♪
111
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:20,083
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
112
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:23,795
Okay, we did not buy tickets.
I repeat, we're not ticket holders.
113
00:08:23,879 --> 00:08:25,214
Stop it. Let them sing.
114
00:08:25,297 --> 00:08:28,717
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
115
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:32,179
♪ Where it's warm
And safe as a new cocoon ♪
116
00:08:32,261 --> 00:08:35,390
♪ And our hearts all glow
Like a harvest moon ♪
117
00:08:35,474 --> 00:08:38,018
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
118
00:08:38,101 --> 00:08:39,102
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
119
00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:42,606
♪ Where the men are men
And the cows are cows ♪
120
00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:46,068
♪ And the farmers smile
As they push their plows ♪
121
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:50,531
♪ And the trees are tall
And we call it Schmigadoon ♪
122
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:52,741
Come on, it's charming.
123
00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:55,035
Charming? It's Wicker Man.
124
00:08:56,119 --> 00:09:00,165
♪ Our schoolmarm is Emma Tate
She helps our kids to punctuate ♪
125
00:09:00,249 --> 00:09:02,793
♪ Still unmarried at 28 ♪
126
00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,336
♪ In Schmigadoon ♪
127
00:09:04,419 --> 00:09:08,674
♪ Farmer McDonough craved a son
But he had daughters, every one ♪
128
00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:10,926
♪ Touch 'em and you'll answer to my gun ♪
129
00:09:12,803 --> 00:09:14,680
-Ow!
-Sorry, Pete!
130
00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:16,974
♪ Larry Bean puts out our fires ♪
131
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,017
♪ Helen Pritt conducts the choirs ♪
132
00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:21,144
♪ Doc is here to cure what ails ♪
133
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:23,188
♪ And I am here in case he fails ♪
134
00:09:23,272 --> 00:09:25,357
♪ He is here in case he fails ♪
135
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,568
Is Pete okay?
136
00:09:27,651 --> 00:09:29,361
♪ Henry Brown brings our ice ♪
137
00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:31,238
♪ Madam Vina gives advice ♪
138
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:33,365
♪ In that shack is Buford Riggs ♪
139
00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,742
♪ I do unspeakable things to pigs ♪
140
00:09:35,826 --> 00:09:37,578
♪ He does unspeakable things to pigs ♪
141
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:40,080
It's the mayor!
142
00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:41,874
This is never gonna end.
143
00:09:41,957 --> 00:09:44,084
Shh. It's the mayor.
144
00:09:44,168 --> 00:09:46,545
♪ As mayor of Schmigadoon ♪
145
00:09:47,546 --> 00:09:50,841
♪ I feel that I must stress ♪
146
00:09:50,924 --> 00:09:52,801
♪ Our motto is ♪
147
00:09:52,885 --> 00:09:56,972
♪ "We always strive
For peace and happiness" ♪
148
00:09:57,556 --> 00:09:59,558
♪ Our motto is ♪
149
00:09:59,641 --> 00:10:05,856
♪ "We always strive
For peace and happiness" ♪
150
00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:06,940
♪ But... ♪
151
00:10:07,024 --> 00:10:08,901
It's Mrs. Layton.
152
00:10:08,984 --> 00:10:12,696
♪ If Schmigadoon is to endure ♪
153
00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:16,158
♪ It must be kept pristine and pure ♪
154
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:19,870
♪ This land on which our fathers trod ♪
155
00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:24,791
♪ Must ever obey the laws of God ♪
156
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:27,836
Everybody!
157
00:10:30,464 --> 00:10:33,634
♪ Schmigadoon! ♪
158
00:10:33,717 --> 00:10:37,513
♪ Where the church bells ring
Every day at noon ♪
159
00:10:37,596 --> 00:10:40,474
♪ And the Wells Fargo wagon
Brought my new harpoon ♪
160
00:10:42,476 --> 00:10:44,394
-Ow!
-Sorry, Pete.
161
00:10:44,478 --> 00:10:47,523
♪ Where a man can dream
Dreams so big and wide ♪
162
00:10:47,606 --> 00:10:51,068
♪ And a gal can be there
Right by his side ♪
163
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:54,571
♪ And there's hope for all
Whether great or small ♪
164
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:58,158
♪ There's no folderol
Bring your parasol ♪
165
00:10:58,242 --> 00:11:02,162
♪ And we call it ♪
166
00:11:02,246 --> 00:11:05,290
♪ Schmiga ♪
167
00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:08,919
♪ Schmiga, Schmiga
Schmiga, Schmiga ♪
168
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:15,551
♪ S-C-H-M-I-G-A-D-O-O-Ohhh! ♪
169
00:11:16,301 --> 00:11:19,888
♪ Schmigadoon! ♪
170
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:22,891
Whoo! Whoo-hoo!
171
00:11:22,975 --> 00:11:25,811
Yay! You guys did that!
172
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:27,688
-Can we please go now?
-Already?
173
00:11:27,771 --> 00:11:29,523
You know how much I hate musicals.
174
00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:31,567
People don't just
burst into song in real life.
175
00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:34,820
Well, you seem okay with magical hammers
that come back when you call them.
176
00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:36,196
That's totally different.
177
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:39,032
Thor is the god of thunder, and of course
Mjollnir comes back when he calls.
178
00:11:39,116 --> 00:11:40,951
-Howdy, folks.
Oh, no.
179
00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:42,786
Please do not make me
interact with the performers.
180
00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:46,874
You know how much I hate the--
Hey! Mr. Mayor.
181
00:11:46,957 --> 00:11:49,209
Welcome to Schmigadoon.
182
00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:51,962
Mayor Aloysius Menlove at your service.
183
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,797
And this is my wife, Florence.
184
00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:55,299
Here, have a button.
185
00:11:55,382 --> 00:11:57,676
I'm running unopposed again.
186
00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,678
But who doesn't love buttons?
187
00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:03,849
-I'm Melissa. This is Josh.
-Pleased to meet you.
188
00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:06,018
You'll be staying
at the Schmigadoon Inn, of course.
189
00:12:06,101 --> 00:12:09,980
Oh, you'll love it. Aloysius and I
stayed there on our honeymoon.
190
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:12,232
Although we didn't
get much sleep that night
191
00:12:12,316 --> 00:12:14,234
on account of all the roosters out back.
192
00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:17,362
-I see.
-Actually, we were just headed out, so--
193
00:12:17,446 --> 00:12:19,573
You know, we've been sleeping
on the ground for days,
194
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:22,201
so why would we pass up an actual bed?
195
00:12:22,284 --> 00:12:23,660
That settles it then.
196
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,788
Carson. Run down to the inn
197
00:12:26,872 --> 00:12:30,250
and tell Harvey we have
two very special guests checking in.
198
00:12:30,334 --> 00:12:31,877
Yes, sir, Mr. Mayor.
199
00:12:34,046 --> 00:12:38,425
Well, what an unusual
and exotic couple the two of you make.
200
00:12:38,509 --> 00:12:40,344
No wedding rings, I see.
201
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,721
-Oh, no, we're not married.
-Definitely not.
202
00:12:43,305 --> 00:12:44,640
-Really?
-What?
203
00:12:44,723 --> 00:12:46,308
Anyhoo, I'm Mildred Layton,
204
00:12:46,391 --> 00:12:48,977
and this is my husband,
the Reverend Layton.
205
00:12:49,061 --> 00:12:51,230
Shoulders back, Howard,
like you have a purpose.
206
00:12:51,313 --> 00:12:53,106
Well, I hope you folks
can stay till Sunday.
207
00:12:53,190 --> 00:12:55,609
Would love to see you
in the congregation, it'd be real special.
208
00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:58,695
Oh, I can promise you
we'll be long gone before then.
209
00:12:58,779 --> 00:13:01,615
-So, where's this inn?
-Ah, right this way.
210
00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:06,578
Hey. Be nice. They're trying.
211
00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,664
And it's kind of modern.
212
00:13:08,747 --> 00:13:10,207
I mean, you saw the ensemble.
213
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,542
It's color-blind casting.
214
00:13:11,625 --> 00:13:13,043
Yeah, but I also get the feeling
215
00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:16,421
the preacher's wife doesn't like
our color-blind casting.
216
00:13:16,505 --> 00:13:17,965
What do you say, little lady?
217
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:19,508
Want the thrill of a lifetime?
218
00:13:19,591 --> 00:13:20,926
Ooh--
219
00:13:21,009 --> 00:13:22,177
First ride's on me.
220
00:13:23,095 --> 00:13:25,514
You just keep your distance, Danny Bailey.
221
00:13:25,597 --> 00:13:28,392
This town would be a far more
decent place without the likes of you.
222
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:30,227
Now, Mrs. Layton, you don't mean that.
223
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:31,478
Oh, yes, I do.
224
00:13:31,562 --> 00:13:34,022
You're nothing
but a scoundrel, a rapscallion,
225
00:13:34,106 --> 00:13:36,316
and, pardon my Jewish, a no-goodnik.
226
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:38,026
Go ahead, the inn's right over there.
227
00:13:38,110 --> 00:13:41,029
Don't waste any more of your time
with this carnival trash.
228
00:13:41,655 --> 00:13:44,658
Yeah, looks like the town bad boy
has a thing for you.
229
00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:47,953
-Guess I'm gonna have to kick his ass.
-Oh, that I'd like to see.
230
00:13:58,255 --> 00:13:59,548
Sorry to keep you waiting.
231
00:13:59,631 --> 00:14:02,009
You must be the visitors
everyone's talking about.
232
00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:04,511
-Suppose you're looking for a room.
-Two rooms.
233
00:14:06,054 --> 00:14:07,347
They're not married, Harvey.
234
00:14:07,431 --> 00:14:10,851
And I'm sure you're well aware
of the town rules regarding such things.
235
00:14:10,934 --> 00:14:13,437
Yes. Yes, of-- of course, Mrs. Layton.
236
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:14,897
Uh, two rooms.
237
00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:18,108
Okay, I get it.
238
00:14:18,192 --> 00:14:21,278
You're the preacher's wife,
and we're living in sin.
239
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:23,197
It's like, "Oh, we're going to hell!"
240
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:25,449
Just the one room, please.
241
00:14:28,744 --> 00:14:31,872
Uh, sorry, sir.
Town policy is town policy.
242
00:14:31,955 --> 00:14:35,000
Okay, listen, Harvey the Innkeeper.
243
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:37,044
I'm tired and frankly
not up for playing along
244
00:14:37,127 --> 00:14:39,004
-with your little show--
-Josh, don't waste the energy.
245
00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:40,839
It's one night. We'll take the two rooms.
246
00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:43,133
Wonderful. That'll be a dollar.
247
00:14:44,218 --> 00:14:47,888
Fine. Yeah. Um... Okay.
248
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,809
Here's a dollar for two rooms.
249
00:14:52,893 --> 00:14:54,394
Thank you, kindly.
250
00:14:54,478 --> 00:14:56,188
This is ridiculous.
251
00:14:56,271 --> 00:15:00,150
Yeah, so to clarify, you're mad
because two rooms only cost a dollar?
252
00:15:00,234 --> 00:15:01,735
No, I'm just--
253
00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:05,822
I'm not interested in pretending
we're in the olden days right now.
254
00:15:05,906 --> 00:15:09,243
Okay, I don't wanna tell you
how to feel about this,
255
00:15:09,326 --> 00:15:10,994
but can you feel different?
256
00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:14,122
I just wanna get a freaking room
with my girlfriend
257
00:15:14,206 --> 00:15:17,084
where there's Wi-Fi and I can check
the score of the Yankees game
258
00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,168
and read my email.
259
00:15:18,252 --> 00:15:21,046
Sorry, sir. Mail wagon won't be here
until next week.
260
00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:22,756
-I hate you.
-Okay.
261
00:15:26,301 --> 00:15:27,970
You guys really are so great.
262
00:15:32,558 --> 00:15:36,228
Okay, granted,
this place is a little insane.
263
00:15:36,311 --> 00:15:40,190
Thank you. It is important to me
that we can hate things together.
264
00:15:40,274 --> 00:15:42,359
I know, sweetie. Me too.
265
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,361
Look, I'm sorry
that I overreacted to all this.
266
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:46,905
I just wish all these people would die.
Is that wrong?
267
00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:48,699
-All right.
268
00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:51,785
Ooh. Hey. You know what I wanna do?
269
00:15:51,869 --> 00:15:57,332
I'm gonna take a long, hot shower,
and then maybe go on the Tunnel of Love.
270
00:15:57,416 --> 00:15:59,835
-Really?
-I know, it's corny,
271
00:15:59,918 --> 00:16:01,795
but what else is there to do, right?
272
00:16:01,879 --> 00:16:03,380
It might be kind of romantic.
273
00:16:04,506 --> 00:16:07,092
You got it. I'll pick you up at 7:00.
274
00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:08,802
-I'll be waiting.
-Oh?
275
00:16:08,886 --> 00:16:13,348
And hey, um, you know,
just 'cause we have two rooms
276
00:16:13,432 --> 00:16:15,851
doesn't mean we gotta use two rooms.
277
00:16:15,934 --> 00:16:19,688
-Oh. Mm-hmm.
-You know what I'm thinking?
278
00:16:28,197 --> 00:16:29,406
I hate this place.
279
00:16:29,489 --> 00:16:31,325
-I'll see you at 7:00.
-Can't wait.
280
00:16:49,676 --> 00:16:50,761
Josh?
281
00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:53,972
Josh.
282
00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:23,585
Evening, miss.
283
00:17:24,336 --> 00:17:27,005
Evening, mister.
284
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:29,466
I don't believe
we were properly introduced.
285
00:17:29,550 --> 00:17:31,093
The name's Danny.
286
00:17:32,094 --> 00:17:35,264
-Danny Bailey.
-Ah, yes, the rapscallion.
287
00:17:35,347 --> 00:17:36,765
I'm Melissa. Gimble.
288
00:17:40,185 --> 00:17:42,312
It's beautiful here at night.
289
00:17:42,396 --> 00:17:43,814
It's not alone.
290
00:17:45,065 --> 00:17:46,358
Offer's still open.
291
00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:48,902
First ride's on me. Second one too.
292
00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:52,447
Oh, no, I'm just here to look around.
293
00:17:52,531 --> 00:17:53,740
You're a funny kid.
294
00:17:54,867 --> 00:17:57,160
Wow, look at all the blossoms.
295
00:17:57,244 --> 00:17:58,871
Happens a lot this time of year.
296
00:17:59,663 --> 00:18:02,541
Whenever the wind blows.
297
00:18:02,624 --> 00:18:05,002
So. You have a feller?
298
00:18:05,085 --> 00:18:07,379
Yes, I have a feller.
299
00:18:07,462 --> 00:18:11,842
And he's okay with you walking on your own
at night, talking with strange men?
300
00:18:12,509 --> 00:18:14,303
Well-- He's...
301
00:18:15,554 --> 00:18:17,306
What's the question again?
302
00:18:17,389 --> 00:18:19,600
Wait a minute. What are you trying to do?
303
00:18:19,683 --> 00:18:21,226
Are you trying to get me to fall for you?
304
00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:23,103
What? No.
305
00:18:23,187 --> 00:18:26,023
Then why do those crazy kind of
thoughts keep running through my head?
306
00:18:26,106 --> 00:18:28,901
-Uh... Oh, I don't really--
-Well, you can forget it.
307
00:18:28,984 --> 00:18:32,571
Because no woman is gonna tie
Danny Bailey down, no how.
308
00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:33,655
Sure.
309
00:18:33,739 --> 00:18:39,870
♪ When a squirrel wants another squirrel
He don't bother to get attached ♪
310
00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:41,371
Oh, I get a private show.
311
00:18:42,998 --> 00:18:46,668
♪ And a robin don't think
About the future ♪
312
00:18:46,752 --> 00:18:50,672
♪ When he's got an itch to be scratched ♪
313
00:18:50,756 --> 00:18:52,257
You're very good.
314
00:18:52,341 --> 00:18:56,845
♪ I'm like an animal in the wild ♪
315
00:18:56,929 --> 00:19:02,100
♪ So here's a truth to which
You must be reconciled ♪
316
00:19:02,184 --> 00:19:03,852
Need a better agent.
317
00:19:07,481 --> 00:19:14,279
♪ You can't tame me
This buck was meant to be free ♪
318
00:19:14,363 --> 00:19:21,203
♪ A cowgirl on the range in El Paso
Smiled at me and got out her lasso ♪
319
00:19:21,286 --> 00:19:27,292
♪ And that's when I put on the gas
Oh, you can't tame me ♪
320
00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:40,848
♪ You can't tame me
I'm like the wind on the sea ♪
321
00:19:40,931 --> 00:19:44,518
♪ A music teacher named Annabella ♪
322
00:19:44,601 --> 00:19:47,980
♪ Tried her best to make me her fella ♪
323
00:19:48,063 --> 00:19:53,861
♪ But I choose to live a cappella
You can't tame me ♪
324
00:19:53,944 --> 00:19:56,822
♪ It's true ♪
325
00:19:58,073 --> 00:20:01,952
♪ But if anyone could ♪
326
00:20:02,035 --> 00:20:09,042
♪ It'd be someone like you ♪
327
00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:21,847
Oh, I don't dance.
I mean, I took like a year of tap--
328
00:20:21,930 --> 00:20:24,808
Shh. Let's let our bodies do the talking.
329
00:20:24,892 --> 00:20:27,728
Oh, well our mouths
are technically part of our bodies, so...
330
00:20:44,286 --> 00:20:47,789
♪ And somehow I can see ♪
331
00:20:48,332 --> 00:20:55,088
♪ Just exactly how it'd be ♪
332
00:20:58,133 --> 00:21:01,470
♪ In a cozy little cottage
With a white picket fence ♪
333
00:21:01,553 --> 00:21:04,640
♪ And a tractor that always needs fixin' ♪
334
00:21:06,183 --> 00:21:09,436
♪ And beamin' with pride
Is the prettiest bride ♪
335
00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:12,856
♪ This side of the Mason-Dixon ♪
336
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:16,902
♪ We'd have a kid
Or two or three ♪
337
00:21:16,985 --> 00:21:22,074
♪ Two girls for you
And two boys for me ♪
338
00:21:22,157 --> 00:21:24,284
Shouldn't all the kids be for both of us?
339
00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:28,705
♪ And the two of us'd
Share one heart ♪
340
00:21:28,789 --> 00:21:33,836
♪ Till someday we'd die one day apart ♪
341
00:21:35,379 --> 00:21:37,047
But that'll never be.
342
00:21:37,130 --> 00:21:40,342
♪ 'Cause you can't tame ♪
343
00:21:40,425 --> 00:21:47,057
♪ Me ♪
344
00:21:48,809 --> 00:21:50,978
Great. Bravo.
345
00:21:51,061 --> 00:21:53,480
That was a very handsome song.
346
00:21:54,273 --> 00:21:55,274
What song?
347
00:21:55,941 --> 00:21:58,277
The one you were just singing to me.
348
00:21:58,360 --> 00:21:59,778
Singing?
349
00:21:59,862 --> 00:22:01,280
Okay.
350
00:22:02,155 --> 00:22:04,950
It's late. Uh, I'm tired.
351
00:22:05,033 --> 00:22:06,660
It's getting weird.
352
00:22:06,743 --> 00:22:10,372
So, thank you and good night.
353
00:22:18,922 --> 00:22:20,257
Sorry about last night.
354
00:22:21,508 --> 00:22:23,927
I seriously didn't mean to fall asleep.
355
00:22:25,179 --> 00:22:26,388
But to make it up to you,
356
00:22:26,471 --> 00:22:29,975
today we can do that Tunnel of Love ride
as many times as you want.
357
00:22:30,058 --> 00:22:32,561
Yeah, I'm good. I'm really hungry.
358
00:22:32,644 --> 00:22:34,062
Can we order? Waitress!
359
00:22:36,231 --> 00:22:37,941
Good morning. How we doing today?
360
00:22:38,025 --> 00:22:39,151
Sleep well last night?
361
00:22:39,234 --> 00:22:41,528
Yes, uh, Betsy. Slept like a log.
362
00:22:44,114 --> 00:22:46,283
Oh, my gosh, "like a log"?
363
00:22:46,366 --> 00:22:49,077
That is hilarious,
'cause logs don't sleep.
364
00:22:49,161 --> 00:22:51,038
-You're so funny!
365
00:22:51,121 --> 00:22:53,457
-I'm not that funny.
-He's really not.
366
00:22:53,540 --> 00:22:55,334
-Could we maybe order something?
-Sure.
367
00:22:55,417 --> 00:22:59,421
You are actually in luck, because today
we have our world-famous corn puddin'.
368
00:22:59,505 --> 00:23:01,673
Corn puddin'? What's that?
369
00:23:01,757 --> 00:23:02,966
What?
370
00:23:03,842 --> 00:23:07,054
Are you trying to tell me
that you've never heard of corn puddin'?
371
00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:09,723
-She's never heard of corn puddin'!
372
00:23:09,806 --> 00:23:13,602
Oh, no. It's a song.
You just started another song.
373
00:23:13,685 --> 00:23:15,771
♪ Corn puddin'
Corn puddin' ♪
374
00:23:15,854 --> 00:23:18,357
♪ Corn puddin', corn puddin'
Corn puddin', corn puddin' ♪
375
00:23:20,526 --> 00:23:21,860
Can we opt out of this?
376
00:23:23,195 --> 00:23:25,322
♪ My gal loves corn puddin' ♪
377
00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:27,366
♪ She eats it constantly ♪
378
00:23:27,449 --> 00:23:29,576
♪ Sometimes I get to wonderin' ♪
379
00:23:29,660 --> 00:23:31,495
♪ Does she love it more than me? ♪
380
00:23:31,578 --> 00:23:34,540
♪ Does she love it more than me? ♪
381
00:23:35,791 --> 00:23:38,043
♪ My guy loves corn puddin' ♪
382
00:23:38,126 --> 00:23:40,087
♪ I've got the recipe ♪
383
00:23:40,170 --> 00:23:42,422
♪ So if he wants my puddin' ♪
384
00:23:42,506 --> 00:23:43,882
♪ He'll have to marry me ♪
385
00:23:43,966 --> 00:23:46,927
♪ Oh, he'll have to marry me ♪
386
00:23:50,222 --> 00:23:52,683
♪ You put the corn in the puddin'
And the puddin' in the bowl ♪
387
00:23:52,766 --> 00:23:55,102
♪ You put the bowl in your belly
'Cause it's good for the soul ♪
388
00:23:55,185 --> 00:23:57,646
♪ You put the corn in the puddin'
And the puddin' in the bowl ♪
389
00:23:57,729 --> 00:23:59,982
♪ You put the bowl in your belly
'Cause it's good for the soul ♪
390
00:24:00,065 --> 00:24:02,234
♪ Who wants corn puddin'? ♪
391
00:24:02,317 --> 00:24:04,695
♪ We want corn puddin' ♪
392
00:24:04,778 --> 00:24:07,030
♪ Who wants corn puddin'? ♪
393
00:24:07,114 --> 00:24:09,408
♪ We want corn puddin' ♪
394
00:24:12,911 --> 00:24:15,706
-W-What?
-Oh, I think they want us to take a verse.
395
00:24:15,789 --> 00:24:18,792
-I'm not singing, and you're not singing.
-Come on, could be fun.
396
00:24:18,876 --> 00:24:20,878
No. Do not.
397
00:24:20,961 --> 00:24:22,546
♪ Never had corn puddin' ♪
398
00:24:22,629 --> 00:24:23,630
Why?
399
00:24:24,214 --> 00:24:26,758
♪ And it may be a waste ♪
400
00:24:27,593 --> 00:24:29,636
♪ But if you've got some extry ♪
401
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:30,637
"Extry"?
402
00:24:30,721 --> 00:24:32,723
♪ I sure would like a taste ♪
403
00:24:32,806 --> 00:24:35,225
♪ Oh, she sure would like a taste ♪
404
00:24:36,977 --> 00:24:41,523
♪ Corn, corn, corn, corn, corn ♪
405
00:24:41,607 --> 00:24:46,320
♪ Puddin'! ♪
406
00:24:48,614 --> 00:24:49,781
♪ Yum! ♪
407
00:24:49,865 --> 00:24:50,866
Yum!
408
00:24:51,491 --> 00:24:53,118
Ooh, that was so weird.
409
00:24:53,202 --> 00:24:55,787
It was like as soon as I started singing,
I knew what to say.
410
00:24:55,871 --> 00:24:57,789
That's fantastic. Can we please go now?
411
00:24:57,873 --> 00:24:59,750
-What? Why?
-Are you serious?
412
00:24:59,833 --> 00:25:02,753
The entire town and you
just spent the last five minutes
413
00:25:02,836 --> 00:25:04,338
singing about corn pudding.
414
00:25:04,421 --> 00:25:06,465
Did somebody say, "corn puddin'"?
415
00:25:06,548 --> 00:25:08,008
-That's it, we're leaving.
416
00:25:08,091 --> 00:25:10,761
-Okay, well that one's on you.
♪ 'Corn puddin' ♪
417
00:25:12,137 --> 00:25:13,805
I just feel bad, you know?
418
00:25:13,889 --> 00:25:16,058
Everybody was so nice.
We didn't even say goodbye.
419
00:25:16,141 --> 00:25:17,559
And risk starting another song?
420
00:25:17,643 --> 00:25:18,852
They'll be fine.
421
00:25:23,106 --> 00:25:24,274
What?
422
00:25:27,110 --> 00:25:28,278
Wait a minute.
423
00:25:32,366 --> 00:25:33,867
What is going on?
424
00:25:33,951 --> 00:25:37,329
-It's like we can't leave.
Well, of course we can leave.
425
00:25:40,457 --> 00:25:42,417
Okay, this is freaky.
426
00:25:42,501 --> 00:25:44,545
It's like it's magic or...
427
00:25:44,628 --> 00:25:46,380
-It's not magic.
-Well, then what is it?
428
00:25:46,463 --> 00:25:49,258
I don't know.
It's like a trick bridge or something.
429
00:25:49,341 --> 00:25:51,426
A trick bridge? What would that even be?
430
00:25:51,510 --> 00:25:53,136
It would be this, okay?
431
00:25:55,597 --> 00:25:56,849
I'm gonna try something.
432
00:26:18,620 --> 00:26:20,205
This cannot be happening.
433
00:26:22,666 --> 00:26:25,544
What's going on, Josh? What is this?
434
00:26:28,088 --> 00:26:32,718
♪ Once ye have entered Schmigadoon ♪
435
00:26:32,801 --> 00:26:37,556
♪ 'Tis true ye won't be leaving soon ♪
436
00:26:37,639 --> 00:26:43,437
♪ Within its borders ye are bound ♪
437
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:48,609
♪ Until at last true love ye've found ♪
438
00:26:49,401 --> 00:26:54,823
♪ But till ye find it, ye must stay ♪
439
00:26:55,532 --> 00:27:01,663
♪ Where life's a musical every day ♪
440
00:27:10,005 --> 00:27:11,298
Was that a leprechaun?
441
00:27:13,091 --> 00:27:14,301
Yes.
442
00:27:14,384 --> 00:27:15,719
Yeah. Uh-huh.
443
00:27:15,802 --> 00:27:17,804
He-- He said something. What did he say?
444
00:27:18,889 --> 00:27:19,973
I don't know.
445
00:27:20,057 --> 00:27:24,770
I was more focused on how he was
shattering my whole construct
446
00:27:24,853 --> 00:27:27,356
of what's real and not real in the world,
447
00:27:27,439 --> 00:27:29,399
because he was a freaking leprechaun.
448
00:27:30,275 --> 00:27:32,319
"Life's a musical every day."
449
00:27:36,949 --> 00:27:40,077
This isn't some tourist attraction.
450
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:41,620
This is a musical.
451
00:27:41,703 --> 00:27:43,997
We're in an actual musical.
452
00:27:44,081 --> 00:27:45,707
Oh, please, God, no.
453
00:27:45,791 --> 00:27:48,752
But he said we're only here
till we've found true love, which--
454
00:27:48,836 --> 00:27:50,379
I love you. Do you love me?
455
00:27:50,462 --> 00:27:51,797
What? Yes, of course.
456
00:27:52,548 --> 00:27:54,842
So let's try the bridge again,
now that we know the rules.
457
00:27:54,925 --> 00:27:56,218
Yes. Now we know.
458
00:27:57,469 --> 00:27:58,637
-I love you.
-Oh.
459
00:27:59,638 --> 00:28:01,098
I love you too.
460
00:28:01,181 --> 00:28:03,267
You hear that, Mr. Leprechaun?
461
00:28:03,350 --> 00:28:04,685
We're in love.
462
00:28:20,284 --> 00:28:22,995
♪ Welcome to our little town ♪
463
00:28:23,078 --> 00:28:25,289
♪ Where friends are all you'll meet ♪
464
00:28:26,498 --> 00:28:29,209
♪ And you will never see a frown ♪
465
00:28:29,293 --> 00:28:32,254
-Hey, everyone.
Hey there, Pete.
466
00:28:32,337 --> 00:28:38,802
♪ We bet you're prob'ly
Wonderin' what we call ♪
467
00:28:38,886 --> 00:28:45,893
♪ The most beautiful, wonderful
Magical place of all ♪
468
00:28:52,983 --> 00:28:55,986
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
469
00:28:56,069 --> 00:28:59,531
♪ Where the sun shines bright
From July to June ♪
470
00:28:59,615 --> 00:29:02,951
♪ And the air's as sweet as a macaroon ♪
471
00:29:03,035 --> 00:29:05,579
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
472
00:29:05,662 --> 00:29:06,663
♪ Schmigadoon ♪
473
00:29:06,747 --> 00:29:09,791
♪ Where a man can dream
Dreams so big and wide ♪
474
00:29:09,875 --> 00:29:13,337
♪ And a gal can be there
Right by his side ♪
475
00:29:13,420 --> 00:29:16,840
♪ And there's hope for all
Whether great or small ♪
476
00:29:16,924 --> 00:29:20,427
♪ There's no folderol
Bring your parasol ♪
477
00:29:20,511 --> 00:29:24,181
♪ And we call it ♪
478
00:29:24,264 --> 00:29:27,434
♪ Schmiga ♪
479
00:29:27,518 --> 00:29:31,188
♪ Schmiga, Schmiga
Schmiga, Schmiga ♪
480
00:29:31,271 --> 00:29:37,819
♪ S-C-H-M-I-G-A-D-O-O-Ohhh! ♪
481
00:29:38,570 --> 00:29:42,157
♪ Schmigadoon! ♪